"I've made my life such a intricate web of lies that I've managed to trap myself within them now. I'm stuck. I can hardly tell who I am anymore. All I want its to forget all of the lies and be left with the truth. But I know that telling the truth will reveal my true character and NONE of my friends will trust me after that. I secretly want to disappear one day and leave EVERYTHING (and everyone) behind."
Just consider the fact that if they're truly your 'friends' then they should know where you're coming from and not judge you so harshly. What they SHOULD judge you harshly on is the lie. You can't keep it up. It's not fair to them or you. Also consider who's hurt by what you're doing right now. It's not fair. If you can't even tell who you are anymore, then people who knew you probably see the change, and they probably don't like it. They liked the old you. That's why they were your FRIENDS in the first place. Look at yourself and look at your decisions. Don't hold out any longer.
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