I can't handle the screaming anymore.

I can't handle the sarcasm anymore.

I can't handle the joking around anymore.

I can't handle the inside jokes I wasn't around for anymore.

I can't handle the insecurities in my own head anymore.

I can't handle the insane anxiety anymore.

I can't handle anything anymore.

It's not as though I can switch any of it off.
You can't assume it's that easy.
If it was, what makes you think I'd still be doing this?
Attention?
Do you think I fucking WANT it?
I hate being the center of anything.
I want to be part of the background.
I want to be so close to nothing that I'm just barely there.
I don't want to be anything to anyone, except you.
That's it.
That's all.
But you can't even begin to understand it.
You can't even GRASP the fact that it's YOU I want to talk to.
It's YOU I want to be with, alone.
It's YOU I want to talk to, share my secrets with, and laugh with.
It's you.  And it always has been.
When will you see?
When will you get it?
I don't need to be anything to anyone except you.
You're the only person who's going to follow me in my future.
I'm going to fall of the face of the earth after I graduate.
I want to see who will keep contact with me.
I want to see who tries.
After guard, I'm probably going to stop going on facebook all together.
I'm going to see who notices.
I won't even care.
I just want YOU to care.
Just you.
That's all.