Smiling on the Inside

I feel accomplished.

I could make it through certain college courses if I really wanted to.

And you know what?

I’m glad.

I’ve felt extremely incapable these past few years,

But it has been proven to me that I am capable.

Writing is a skill you gain,

And once you gain it,

It becomes an art that you learn to perfect,

Much like a skill.

I can’t make him see that, but eventually I hope he’ll get it.

He was jealous of me.

That sounds so unusual.

Someone jealous of me?

How often does that happen?

But he told me so.

It’s the first time he’s ever come out and say it,

And it makes me feel better, even if worse for the moment,

Trying to console him is hard,

But I want him to work harder this year.

I want him to care.

To want to do better.

So by means of my femininity,

I will encourage his growth into uncharted territory,

I will assist him into the unknown,

And I will be there for him,

Unlike last time,

Because he’s always been there for me.

I love him.

And I’m going to stick around this time.